30 things I've learned in 30 months of living in the UK

This week has been particularly auspicious for us, as we carefully marked 2 ½ years since we touched down in our new country.  As we are on a five year visa, this is the half way mark to us applying for ILR and making our home permanently here in the UK.  It’s a weird feeling, so much has happened and yet it feels like it passed in a blink.  The next 2 ½ years seems so long but we know it will be filled with learnings and experiences as we settle ourselves even more.

Along the way we’ve learned plenty so to celebrate the milestone, I thought I’d share something we’ve learned for every month we’ve been here (I’ll keep it short, I promise!).

So here’s my list of 30 things we’ve learned in 30 months of living in the UK:

1. The sun shines more than you think.
2. Discussing the weather is a national sport and you quickly learn the rules of engagement.
3. The weather is constantly measured in record terms - in other words, every weather system is breaking some kind of record, even if it's only last year's.  The older and bigger the record, the more media coverage and the higher the levels of anxiety about it.  
4. We use more non-English words in our speech than we realise - you spend loads of time translating in your head because the people around you don’t know what gatvol means.
5. We use English words differently too – words such as shame, which no South African can escape using, are not taken as an affectionate phrase but more of an insult.  I once had my colleagues rolling on the floor when I spoke about my geyser being broken.
6. Fun fact: you are never more than 75 miles (as the crow flies) from the coast, no matter where you are in the country.
7. You eventually stop feeling self conscious about your accent when you realise that the English have multiple different accents.  In fact, the accent changes approximately every 25 miles.
8. There is a society for absolutely everything, I mean that.  Allow me to introduce you to the RoundaboutAppreciation Society – their chairman is called Lord of the Rings.
9. Driving is the same but different, the multitude of roundabouts takes getting used to (no, it’s not treated as a 4-way stop where everyone takes turns), as well as the mind-bogglingly narrow roads. 
10. The Highway Code will teach you about the different signs on the motorway so you aren’t completely in the dark, buy a copy as quickly as you can.

    

    The weather can be epic and definitely worth talking about!

11. You quickly learn how to speak in miles and convert this in your head to distances you can understand.
12. Animals such as cows, can actually bring your journey to a halt. 
13. There aren't any truly dangerous creatures in this country.  Except cows.  Those guys kill people every year.
14. Less than 18C is not actually cold and you find yourself celebrating anything in the double digits as being rather “warm”.  25C can genuinely be really hot, especially in this country.  30C is unbearable.
15. The country reacts to extreme weather and shops running empty on certain stock – a heatwave brings a shortage of ice and any kind of frozen dessert, fans become currency as do splashpools.  An extreme storm brings a shortage of wine, milk and bread as people prepare to be cut off in their homes. 
16. The first time you realise that the country runs out of ice cream when it’s hot is the first time your realise that nobody eats ice cream all year round, and that feels a bit weird.
17. There are coats for different types of weather and you eventually end up with at least 6.
18. Decent boots are not negotiable, so spend your money well and wisely and invest in proper footwear.
19. Hail over here is really quite cute, about the size of polystyrene balls.  Snow on the other hand, can be really epic.
20. It takes about a year before you stop worrying about the lack of bars on the windows at home.

    

    Look ma!  No bars!

21. Somewhere in the first year you will experience losing something and finding it returned to the nearest shop or customer service counter, or even leaving your keys in the door and finding them in the same place on your return with everything untouched. 
22.  There is work to be found, if you want it.  Bread and butter jobs are plentiful but it takes time to rebuild your career after the move.
23.  Alcohol is breathtakingly expensive and it’s quite an internal struggle to spend the equivalent of R100 on absolutely rubbish plonk.
24. Don’t ever buy biltong from a retailer, just don’t.  Some things are better left to the experts so find yourself a supplier close to home as quickly as you can.
25. Fun fact: London has the highest number of languages (300) than any other city (or country) in the world.
26. Not all Saffas that you meet will be your cup of tea and that’s OK, you don’t have to be friends with every person who shares the same passport as you.
27. You can have a highly enjoyable and entertaining day out with the family and not actually spend any money.
28. People spend more money on their pets than their children.  Not in a neglectful way, it’s just more expensive to have a dog than a child in the UK.
29. It’s possible to live in a house that is older than Johannesburg.
30. You never quite get used to seeing photos of the beach and summer fun on your social media feed whilst it’s sub zero and dark as midnight outside.

    

    Empty dessert freezers during the hot, hot summer of 2018

We have no regrets about our move, considering all the pain and stress it took to get here, we have embraced life in the UK as much as we can.  Here’s to the next 30 months and making our stay a permanent one.